Being scared is no fun. Your legs shake, your hands sweat, you either hyperventilate or forget to breathe – it’s hard to say which one of those is worse – your vision narrows and options disappear. But, nobody has to be scared because despite what you see in the media, or among your friends, or even when you look in the mirror, your emotions are not you. It is possible to control your emotions and possible to control your fear. This is the basis of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), which has proved to be one of the most effective treatments for psychological distress that humans have invented.
Doug’s wrist is still a bit of a bother so I led all the pitches today. I’ve been known to be an anxious leader even when the climb is quite safe. Once, I almost blacked out while leading an easy slab route! I don’t think many people can say that, although it’s likely not something I should brag about.
On the first lead of the day, always a bit shaky, I thought “I don’t want to be scared all day. Fear sucks and it will ruin my day.” So I wasn’t. I fell off a few times, I thrutched a bit, I used my mantra, which is: “you can do this, you can do this, you can do this,” repeated as many times as needed, and I had a fantastic day. Because I am not my emotions and neither are you.
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