Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with
age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself. Tom Wilson.
I turned 50 today. It's hard to
believe I have been on this planet for half a century, and, that the
bulk of my life (I don't think I'll live to 100, hell, I'm not even
sure I want to live to that long) is over. Age is supposed to confer
wisdom, but, truthfully the angst of youth never feels far away.
With each passing year, some degree of
acceptance comes, yet, like most of us, if we are truly honest, I
still feel the need to prove myself, to compare favorably with
others, to simply “be someone.” In many ways I have the same
goals I had ten years ago, to climb harder grades, to lift more
weight, to run faster. I still work towards these goals moving one
step forward, two steps back, never seeming to get that much closer,
yet never willing to give up.
Sometimes I wonder if at 70 or 80 I
will still be trying to push my climbing up one grade, or add another
5 kilograms to my deadlift. If I am, will that be a good thing or a
bad thing? Should one accept declining ability gracefully with age,
or is it better to go “not gently into that good night?”
Doug, paddling on the Woronora River today
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